Damnaliens DVD Review by Steve Sawicki
© 2001 Ernest Lilley / SFRevu
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May, the month when we start getting teased about summer releases and when
hollywood starts releasing the dogs early for our pleasure.
The same happens in the video and dvd realm.
Cry haddock and let loose the fish of Warr.
(Warrís an alien friend and he likes his fish let loose at least once a
- Superman, Sex and Slaughter, and the Firesign Theater.
- Superman, Sex and Slaughter, and the Firesign Theater.
we go from April where Iím desperate for finding material for this column to
this month where DVDís come at you like, well, like a speeding locomotive.
Speaking of trains, Superman,
the Movie, Special Edition gets released this month.
The DVD contains some special material including screen tests, deleted
scenes, added scenes, a making of special and more.
You donít buy DVDís for the added material though you buy them for
the movie. I couldnít find the
added scenes and while I like Superman, The Movie, I didnít like it enough to
watch it twice in a row. Christopher
Reeves before he fell under the Superman curse, Margot Kidder before she fell
under the Superman curse, Gene Hackman before, well heís pretty much been
under the curse since forever.
if watching a grown man in tights fly around for two hours isnít enough theres,
II. More of the same with a
bit more camp. I really wish they
had added Bizarro or Krypto or at least red Kryptonite just to make it more
Carpenter once had a pair of blue tights. He
claimed they were the device for all of his inspiration.
While this explains a lot it doesnít quite go far enough to explain why
every once in a while Carpenter manages to produce something like Big
Trouble in Little China. This
film came out in 1968 and it paired Carpenter with Kurt Russell.
The two would work together a number of times.
While Russellís character is no Snake Plisskin (but then who is?) he
does a credible job of working his way through this supernatural adventure story
about a trucker who gets into otherworldly trouble in the heart of Chinatown.
Sure thereís plenty of kung fu action but the real kick comes when
Russellís trying to save Kim Cattrall and Suzee Pai.
Russell plays your basic big muscled idiot but and does so incredibly
well. Thereís real believability here.
Carpenter manages to produce some incredible scenes in this film and also
writes all the music.
when you thought it was safe to go back to Hollywood a film slips out that
reminds you why you started going to movies in the first place.
In this next DVD, which is sort of a detective horror flick, Private Eye
Jack Chandler is on a new case, searching for a runaway.
Instead he stumbles across...Hollywood
Chainsaw Hookers. Chandler
gets more than he bargains for as he gets pulled into this group of cultist no-goodbodies.
One of the first things Chandler discovers is that they charge an arm and
there you are, standing in the video store, in your blue tights and what do you
see? An old black and white flick,
in Esperanto no less, and starring, William Shatner. Hey, it just doesnít get any better than this.
Trust me when I tell you that you will never see anything like this
again. First of all, this is a
story about a young Succubus (Allyson Ames) whoís bored with luring stupid
dolts to their doom and who wants a real challenge.
She decides to tackle a truly good man.
And that man is? No, not Superman. William
Shatner. Now, Shatner manages to
defile this young woman, all the while espousing in Esperanto in the infamous Shatner
intonation. The now corrupted girl
must call upon an Incubus to redeem her. Low
budget effects, no men in blue tights and William Shatner speaking in tongues.
kind of fool do I take you for? First Class. Firesign
Theater, Back From The Shadows. I
will not even attempt to try to describe this.
Those of you who know will know. Those
of you who donít, Rocky Rococco and the guy in the blue tights, will just have
to figure it out. In the end, just
remember, the sunís not going down, the horizonís moving up.
Classics - Scary Sci-Fi Stories Seduce Sawicki!
and years ago Sam Raimi had a vision. His
vision was humor mixed with gruesome mayhem.
While many may think that Raimi is best known for that other blue tight
wearing individual (No, not John Carpenter), he is actually best known for the
dead trilogy. The four films that
make this trilogy all began with this one, The
Evil Dead, All the beginning markers are here.
Walking dead, Babes, Bruce Campbell, and, well thatís all you really
need for this series. More mayhem than any one of us truly deserves.
do you get when you mix the midwest and toxic waste? Bob Kerry cavorting in Blue underwear? As scary as that is, itís nothing compared to what Bo
Hopkins and Wings Hauser come across in Mutant,
Come to think of it with names like Bo and Wings, perhaps they deserve it.
Toxic Waste, Zombies, special appearance by Jennifer Warren, zombies,
toxic waste and, well, more toxic waste.
Usher, as his beautiful young wife (why is it these young wives are never ugly
or at least just plain?) slowly dies invites his friend over.
The wife dies. Or maybe she donít. Roderick
becomes melancholy and the friend vows never to accept another invitation.
Fall Of The House of Usher, is actually a compilation of several
of Poeís stories. This French
film is surreal and nearly 80 years old. This
is a new release of this classic and is really a must see.
Great acting, great direction, great camera work, beautiful music and not
a guy in tights anywhere to be seen.
SFTV - Amaze your friends! Show your own reruns!.
if the big screen werenít pooping out enough product we get deluged by
television as well. What do these
guys think we do in the summer?
X-Files, the complete third season
SG1, entire first season
Anime - "Bubblegum Crisis Vs Battle Queen 2020! Much Better than Giant Mumbling Robots!"
could have reviewed more mumbling robots but I just couldnít get around to it.
Besides, if they can build those huge gundams they can damn well do
better with the sound and dialogue.
I found myself drawn into the world of BattleQueen
More anime than you could ever hope to get through.
The Japanese seem to have a knack for shooting these things out in high
quality. Good story, interesting graphics, if a bit in the scooby doo
school of animation.
when you thought it was all over you can return to what has been acclaimed (not
by me) as one of the top three anime ever!
Crisis, Tokyo 2040, Vol 5, Blood and Steel continues the story and
itís one you shouldnít miss. Not a giant mumbling robot in the entire thing.