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We Will Destroy Your Planet: An Alien's Guide to Conquering the Earth (Dark) by David McIntee
Cover Artist: Miguel Coimbra
Review by Steve Sawicki
Osprey Publishing Paperback  ISBN/ITEM#: 9781782006022
Date: 19 November 2013 List Price $14.95 Amazon US / Amazon UK / Publisher's Book Page / Show Official Info /

The sub title says it all: An Alien's Guide to Conquering the Earth. Except it's not so much that as it is a Human's guide to how the Earth might or might not get conquered. With chapters on Attacking the Earth, Surface Operations, Weapons and Martial Arts, Collateral Damage and Living on Earth, the book covers pretty much anything you'd want to know about the planet if you were going to invade. The book is written in a more or less straightforward style although there are moments where you think McIntee is going to slip into humor. It never quite does and I wonder if the book might have been more entertaining if he had.

The book is actually more interesting for all the facts it provides about the planet, the solar system, and the galaxy in which they both exist. There are factoids aplenty here and that is what I found more interesting then the premise, which was not as well played out as I had hoped it might be. Perhaps this was due to the nature of the narrative which is directed to aforementioned aliens who might be planning an attack. However the diversity of said aliens makes this a difficult premise to pull off. So, it might have been more effective to have been directed to a single empire and presented more as a guide and history.

It's an interesting book, no doubt, and one that I found interesting to read although, again, the premise often got in the way as I tried to imagine just who these aliens might be. So, I recommend it because it's an interesting guide to a lot of things you never realized you wanted to know but will be glad you did. I recommend it because you can jump around from place to place which makes it a great book for those times when you can't devote more than a few minutes in a row to reading. I recommend it because it's an unusual effort and those deserve some support. Take the caveats in mind though if what you are looking for truly, is a guide to conquest or destruction.

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